A letter to a future big sister.

Dear Evelyn,

I never thought I would be saying that so soon! Your Daddy and I are so overwhelmed, excited and maybe a little scared to be welcoming a new baby into the world, but we are certain that you'll be an amazing sister!

Many parents are scared and nervous about bringing a new baby into the family, but not us. You've loved babies ever since you were born. You love your baby dolls and your so gentle with any newborn you come in contact with. I have 100% confidence in you being the best big sister and mommies little helper.

I'm sure when you heard me tell you that you were going to be a big sister, that nothing clicked into your head. While my head was fuzzy and trying to comprehend what was happening you gladly replied with "sissser", ever since then if I ask if you want to be a big sister you smile and reply "sissser". Your making us all very excited to see you be a big sister.

I have no doubt that you'll have your good days and bad days with this new little adventure we are embarking on, but I also know how well you adapt to new things, so I hope you'll do very well!

I know its going to be hard, and I know you might not always feel loved when you got another baby in the mix. But I will love you and your new sibling whole heartedly! Your never going to not have your parents love. We will always love you baby girl, you have been a huge rock in this family and we try to better ourselves for you and now your new sibling.

I cannot wait to see you grow into this new adventure and become an amazing big sister! You'll always have us and your sibling in your life and its a bond to cherish.

I love you.

Love, Mom

Dear Baby #2

Hello little one. Your certainly a welcome surprise. Your sister is right next to me acting like she can type, I don't think she really know's what a sister is right now...but I hope she'll catch on quick.

Its strange how finding out I was pregnant with you went along.

It was April 23, 2013 and I just had a gut feeling like I did with your sister, that something was up. I knew I wanted another baby and I was preparing for you physically and mentally, but I was not ready at the moment. I finally decided I just needed to take a test and get the anxiety over with.

I went into the bathroom and took the test and ran out of the room and sat on my bed...its similar to the moment I found out I was pregnant with your sister. I urged myself to stay outside the room until the 2 minutes were up. I went into the bathroom and saw the words "pregnant"....I won't lie...I smiled and then I screamed for your Dad. He had no clue I was in the bathroom taking a test, and as soon as I saw him he knew that I was pregnant. I looked at your sister and instantly cried...I couldn't believe her time as an only child was now limited and she was about to be a sister. What a huge step.

Your Dad stayed quite and I knew he would...but then said "it better be a boy". We had already been talking about a baby the last few days and what we would do a nursery like, talked about names as well. But we both know we want whatever is healthy and happy.

Oh little child of mine...I can't believe it. Your coming into such a loving wonderful family, as much as I was not expecting you, your going to be so loved. Your sister is going to spoil you with kisses and hugs!

I can't wait to meet you. Your already so much apart of our family and so loved!! I hope you enjoy the peace and quite right now...because soon you'll be here with us and its never quite here.

I love you.

Love,

Mommy.

Suzy Q

Dear Suzy,

Seems like this letter comes up so fast. I'm glad I have a space to write you, even though you'll never receive it. Today marks 13 years since you left us, every day I think of you and that will never go away. I can't watch video's or look at pictures without wanting to cry. Though as time goes on I know that it gets a little easier, I'll never stop missing you or loving you, but I now feel peaceful knowing that your always around me. Sometimes I swear I can feel it.

I sometimes think about all the things your missing out on, but your not missing out on anything, you really are here. Your in my heart, mind and your in the air with us all. You maybe in a better place, in a heaven with no hurt, but your there to help me through my struggles and sometimes that's all I need is to know you're here.

I will spend this day doing what I normally do, taking care of Evelyn and missing you and home. But I know I'll find myself listening to some songs that remind me of you, maybe even watch She's All That just because that's what we would do together. I might even watch the video I made for the family after you died. You see how much I cry during that, but its just because I know that I have that with me, and that is who you were. It brings so many memories back to me..some that are gone are gone forever, but I can't wait to hear the stories when we meet again.

I know this year you've been joined in heaven by a few friends of yours and of mine. Tell them hi and that I love them all. I know you have probably seen my unborn child, and you've probably held it in your arms. It just makes having children that much more special to me. You loved them before I even knew them.

I miss you Suzy. I wish you were here all the time. We will be together forever someday.

Love your amazing special little sister,
Lizzie.

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